Online Safety Update for LGBTQ+ Community
NSW Police have advised ACON of a high number of recent assaults across NSW, particularly in Western Sydney and South West Sydney that have occurred following hook-ups arranged via online apps popular with our community. Now might be a good time for us to refresh our approach to online safety.
Please always remember that if you are in immediate danger, call 000.
To keep yourself safe when meeting in person for the first time, consider taking a few precautions like; sharing your location with a friend, doing a video chat first or meeting in a public place, trusting your instincts and leaving if you are feeling unsafe or aren’t into it.
ACON have been advised that a number of recent assaults have allegedly been perpetrated by groups of young men and teenagers, who, after connecting with people on hookup apps, quickly move to other less traceable apps, and then organise to meet up in isolated areas like parks. Because of the nature of these assaults, you may wish to consider verifying the age of the person you are organising to meet, and communicating only through the platform you connected on or via traceable means like texting.
Check out the safety tips and features on your hookup app, like Grindr’s, for more information. ACON also have a range of safety resources on our website.
If you have experienced violence, and you feel safe to do so, consider contacting your local Police or LGBTIQ Liaison Officer for support. You can also anonymously report at Crime Stoppers.
The NSW Police Force Hate Crime Unit are highly concerned about these assaults and are in regular contact with ACON. The NSW Police Force encourage people to report any incidents to them. People can report anonymously via Crime Stoppers. Anonymous reports are difficult for the Police to investigate, but any information will help them to gather intelligence about these assaults.
If you would like to access ACONs mental health support services, please call 1800 063 060, email intake@acon.org.au , or enquire online at www.aconhealth.org.au/intake_form
8 tips for dating app safety
1. Get a face pic
“Real” people on apps like Grindr or Scruff, Bumble or Hinge usually have multiple pics. That’s just how this works. You should easily be able to get several pics, and not just ones of their body. Tell them you want to see their face. If they say they “don’t have” any, it might be worth reconsidering. Keep in mind that some people are hesitant to share pics for their own safety. But usually, many people should be able to share face pics freely.
2. Be cautious about changing platforms.
ACON have been advised that a number of recent assaults have allegedly been perpetrated by groups of young men and teenagers, who, after connecting with people on hookup apps, quickly move to other less traceable apps, and then organise to meet up in isolated areas like parks. Because of the nature of these assaults, you may wish to consider verifying the age of the person you are organising to meet, and communicating only through the platform you connected on or via traceable means like texting.
3. Ask for their phone number
When you get their phone number, it’s another method of validating their identity. You could even text each other a bit before meeting up to check the number is real.
4. FaceTime
Some apps have video call functions built into them which are great for a quick face to face before you meet. If you have their phone number, you can ask to FaceTime. For some, it’s simply “too much work,” for a casual hook up, so they might not do it. But others will be more than happy to briefly chat before meeting up IRL.
5. Share your location with a friend
There are numerous apps to share your location with friends, like Find My Friends, but the easiest way is to share your location directly from your phone. All you have to do is head into a friends contact and at the bottom it will read share my location. Then it will let you determine how long you would like to share your location for. Shoot a friend a text to let them know you are going out for a hook up, and if they don’t hear from you in a few hours or see any movement, they should find out what’s up!
6. Talk about what you want to do before meeting and set boundaries
If you want to bottom, use condoms, only do oral, or chat in person a bit before getting down to business, make that clear. It’s a really good idea to chat about what you both want to do before you go over to a person’s house (or host).
7. If you’re not into it, leave
If you’re not feeling it for whatever the reason, you can leave. Don’t be afraid to say “I’m not feeling this. I’m going to go.” Just because you planned to do things with them sexually before meeting doesn’t mean you have to go ahead with it. You always have the option to say no and you always have the option to leave (or ask them to leave).
8. Go with your instinct
If something seems off, then don’t meet. Even if you can’t put your finger on exactly what the person is doing, if something smells fishy, stay at home. Remember: There will always be more opportunities. It’s not worth risking your safety and emotional wellbeing for a casual encounter.
Resources and Support
- Rainbow Sexual, Domestic and Family Violence Helpline (1800 497 212), available 24/7
- 1800RESPECT (1800 737 732), available 24/7
- QLife (1800 184 527), 3pm – Midnight every day
- Find a service near you through Say It Out Loud here